Prince got married to the princess and they lived happily ever after! Story ends here. If you get relegated in history at the time of your happy moments, you are supposed to have lived happily thereafter, since no one has further information about your life!!
Does that happen in reel or real life? First of all, if things are going well, there is hardly anyone who would like become irrelevant and pass on to history! And if you remain relevant or visible, can you be happy at all time?
Everyone desires happy life; but there are very few who can define what happiness means. Most people confuse pleasure for happiness and pleasure always becomes a source for pain!
Our constant struggle to get happiness
We generally have wrong perceptions, undue expectations and faulty actions to get happiness. If sun is not shining, food is not tasty, boss is not pleased or work is worrisome, we believe we cannot be happy. It is firmly rooted in the mind of most that happiness comes with a good job, fat salary, modern house, beautiful or handsome spouse.
Often 2 persons find each other very complementary; they come close and crave for happiness but invariably develop cracks in their relationship. You, therefore, find that celebrities or famous personalities like scientists, artists, sportsmen or leaders have mostly troubled life even though every mean might be at their disposal.
Notion of many is that happiness can be planned, programmed, procured or brought by creating pressure on mind! You actually can never do that.
Cause of this struggle has purely to do with our flawed perception and definition of what is happiness and how it comes!!
Clear up the confusion between pleasure and happiness
Pleasure and happiness are vastly different; but very difficult for most to differentiate. We have tendency to fall prey to pleasure; but pleasure also slips from our hands easily.
Here is how you can clearly figure out real difference:
- Pleasure is emotional; but happiness is inspirational!
- Pleasure requires means; happiness rests only on mind.
- Pleasure requires support; happiness is stand alone.
- Pleasure pushes for attachment; happiness promotes detachment.
Remember that detachment is not relinquishing or running away; but to stay put!
- Pleasure triggers our senses; happiness stimulates our mind.
- Pleasure has preconceived notion; happiness is totally open.
- Pleasure shuns pain; happiness embraces both.
Secret to convert pleasure into happiness
Our life invariably comprises of positive and negative, right or wrong, good or bad. We feel pleasure if we can manage both and if we mismanage, we feel the pain! Both pleasure and pain are nothing but states of our mind.
What is very critical is to understand role that our past memories play on the state of our mind. Past memories have 2 parts – information and emotions. Past information is a source for our wisdom; but past emotions influence our woes! If our current state of mind gets complemented by past emotions, it becomes a pleasure; but if it is in conflict, it becomes a pain. As an example, a thought that “He could work it out; so I can also” from past memories brings confidence and that is complementary to what you are trying to work now. This would make your work a pleasure! But, instead if you think “He could work it out; but that does not mean I can also”, it becomes despair and what you are doing now would become a pain!!
In practical life, you cannot evoke only complementary emotions from past memories in your mind; you also pull in conflicting emotions. It is for this reason that you go into bouts of pleasure and pain; you can’t live happily ever after even with your most beloved or precious.
If you want to experience pleasure or peace most of times, the only and only way is to convert your pleasure into happiness! Here is the secret to do that:
“If you could focus or observe only your current state of mind while doing what you want or have to do now and ignore complementary as well as conflicting emotions from past, then your pleasure converts into happiness and pain would be reduced to an experience – good or bad would not matter to you!”
Remember what would be very difficult for you is to dissuade complementary emotions of past to come during pleasure, so also conflicting ones during pain. But, do not forget that in your routine life, you do convert your pleasure into happiness from time to time but in traces or pieces without being conscious of it. Now that you know the secret, you can practice it consciously! Your happiness level would increase for sure.
You need happiness for more than one reason. Happiness not only retains your pleasure but brings success and shine, wealth and wisdom, health and holistic growth! And your story continues – happy ever after!