Tag Archives: Beliefs

It’s the purpose “beyond you” that alone can make your life par excellence!

A Purpose brings Par Excellence! Source: http://www.flickr.com/

If you believe that your profession, pursuit or passion by itself matters most for your career or personal life, then you are most probably mistaken! What really matters is the purpose, for which you are doing it!!

I have come across several employees in the organizations I have served, who after few years’ of experience, want to quit and pursue full time MBA degree course. When I used to enquire why they want to do that, when they are developing well in their current profile, some would reply that they see MBA degree as a vehicle for their personal growth and others wanted to do it because their college mates have done it. If I now look at those MBA degree holders, more than 95% of them have not grown better than ones, who opted to stay put; rather, some of them are lagging behind their peers. Only less than 5% grew well; but was it because of MBA degree or competence and qualities they are already possessed? One thing, I have found strikingly similar with said 95% employees – they did not have a clear purpose or vision!

In corporate, private or public lives, what is missing is the coaching and correct emphasis on how to set the purpose or vision of your life and then align everything to that. Choosing a profession or passion without purpose is like a journey without destination. You are then destined to come on crossroads, where you would face confusion or crisis.

So, a clear purpose for your pursuit is of paramount importance; at the same time, you also need to understand its larger implications.

Understand larger impact of what you do!

Whether you chose to do something or not, you are bound to create a larger impact, which you seldom imagine. Remember, you are not alone in world; you exist, because of existence of others and everything around you. You influence what is around you and what is surrounding you influences you. Look at some real life examples below:

  1. Your happiness and health make your friends happy, when they see you! Your foes may become unhappy; but then, that is also an influence you have triggered!
  2. If you smile when you see a stranger, may be that it would cheer her up or at least it would strike good impression on her!
  3. If you render help to a needy happily, you are part of that section in society who likes to help others. May be tomorrow, you would need help and this way, there would be many hands willing to help you!
  4. If you become an engineer, doctor or any other professional, you are increasing potential of your community and country to improve!
  5. If you are able to help your company to reduce cost or increase earning, however small, you are contributing to boost GDP of your country and government’s ability to upgrade public life!

Whatever big or small, private or public work you do, you are serving a purpose, much larger than you normally imagine. If you become conscious of the same, it would enhance your self-confidence; make you feel more important; you would feel more responsible and accountable; it would energize you; change and charge you up. One thing is absolutely certain that it bring significant paradigm shift and you would start to see life in a new light!

So, what is behind such dramatic change? Erstwhile, you were seeing things up to you; but now through same things, you are looking beyond you!

Why purpose of your pursuit should be “beyond you”!

Most of us consider it fair to set our purpose “up to us”. Fair enough; but then we do face the following:

  • By setting limit up to us, we limit the height we can scale.
    It takes us through cycles of good and bad times. It is more probable that duration of difficult phases would be longer than decent ones!
  • It encourages us to become egotist and emotional.
  • It would not allow us to beat our biases.
  • We would tend to be self-serving and encounter more conflicts.

On other hand, some in the name of benevolence, sacrifice or service, dedicate their lives only for others! God men, fundamentalists or like, whose purpose is only to impact others, fall in this category. It looks very holy; but look at how hollow and harmful is that:

  • They believe they have reached end of their beliefs; there is no need to change or improve!
  • They are not accountable for their acts; what they do is sacrosanct and above any sin!
  • They promote blind faith and followings.
  • Their real life is a closely guarded secret!

So, there is fatal flaw in making your purpose purely for others!

Only when you make your purpose “beyond you” or “beyond I”, it includes you as well as others. It makes a magical difference! 

How to a set purpose “Beyond you”

  1. Evaluate and understand larger implications of whatever you do, as mentioned above. Go as far as you can to see these implications. If need be, take help of your mentor or discuss it with your well-wisher/s.
  2. Select a goal, as per your dream, desire or competence.
  3. Imagine and investigate larger impact and implication of this goal on you and those around you. As examples – if you are an engineer, you are able to develop X no. or Y % of your team members, so that they become capable of heading a business unit or whole organization. Now, if such could be impact of your goal, then you would be the first to become capable to perform the said function and most likely get an opportunity to do so! If you are an artist, your work could create awe in at least 51% of people, who would witness it. It would mean that your work has to be par excellence to bring that kind of effect!!
  4. Then, chose that larger impact or effect as the purpose of your life or career.

It is that purpose “beyond you”, which becomes your vision and that vision is what makes you visionary. It is bound to bring par excellence in various facets of your life!

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Can your Genes make you Genius?

A Genius in making! Source: http://www.flickr.com/

Is ability to become a genius a genetic phenomenon? None from family of Albert Einstein, who was undoubtedly one of the greatest geniuses, parents or grandparents, was known to be genius in any field. From his first wife, who also studied science, he had 1 daughter and 2 sons. But, none of Einstein’s children did anything spectacular in their profession. Another notable genius – Isaac Newton had his parents with farming background and none in his family tree showed any sign of being genius. He did not get married.

Statistically, children of most geniuses that history has produced seem to be mediocre! It appears rare that a genius has given birth to another genius!!

So, what makes a genius?

Genes are only good to trigger a set of tendencies!

Can your genes predetermine what would be your character and competencies? Biology or physiology does not have a clear answer. Latest research shows that genes or DNA does have effect on your tendencies; but, these can undergo a change depending upon the environments, in which you grow or by practice, you could effect a change!

So, genes may prompt a person to have tendency of being creative, hyperactive possessive or destructive. A child of a scientist could be creative as well as possessive and could turn out to be a fashion designer. However, possessive tendency may not make her/him a genius or extra-ordinary, unless she/he endeavors to dilute this tendency!

Do geniuses have to be eccentric or abnormal?

There is a misconception in minds of many that a normal human being can’t be a genius. Paradoxically, historical data shows that most geniuses tend to be abnormal in their behavior. Problem essentially crops up from the fact that a genius tends to be highly passionate or even obsessed and insanely engaged with his/her field of activity to the extent that he/she starts to ignore feelings of other people and other attributes of a good life. This makes them isolated, unfriendly or uncanny!

To my knowledge, if a genius has balanced life and vibe, he/she would be far more effective and efficient! So, we need to drop the notion that a genius is likely to be eccentric; but to have unconventional thinking or style is perfectly in order!!

Can an average level IQ make you genius?

Contrary to popular belief, intelligence or IQ level has nothing to do with ingenuity! A genius would mostly likely not score high number in IQ test. In other words, a high IQ person is unlikely to be a genius! And ironically as also historically, emotional intelligence – EQ of a genius also tends to be low!!

Low IQ and EQ levels are what make a person ordinary! So, there is no reason why an ordinary person cannot be a genius!! But…. here below is the real catch:

  1. Science has so far not been able to figure out what makes a genius!
    It is busy measuring dimensions of parietal lobe of cerebral cortex and some other parts of human brain. They have done this for Einstein post his demise!!
    But, through this article, you have possibility to fathom how genius comes.
  2. Genius does not reside in genes, but in mind!
    But ironically, science does not know where exactly resides mind!!
    And, every normal human being has same power of mind!!!
  3. To be genius:
    1. You need no preconceived notion!
    2. You need to disbelieve known beliefs.
    3. You need to go off-track.
    4. You need to think freely, yet focus within a predefined perimeter.
    5. You need to be free from fear and fallacies.
    6. You need to think diverse but dedicatedly.
    7. You need to be passionate, but never prisoner of your own or others’ thoughts.
    8. You need to believe in impossible.
    9. You need to have deep sense of a purpose and single minded pursuit!

Now, choose an area you want to be genius in!

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Your Mind is the Emperor; use its power to excel!

Source: http://www.flickr.com/

Stark truth of nature is that nothing is more powerful in your life than your own mind!! Your understanding, knowledge, ability to recognize, to have feeling or sensation and consciousness in general is possible only because of your mind. Life and mind are 2 integral parts of one whole i.e. You!

Mind is as old as life itself; but ironically it is only in very recent years that science has understood its relevance. Science knows constitution of brain; but not of mind. General comprehension is that mind means not only brain; but much more, which is beyond any definition as of now.

What is mind

There is no unanimity as of now on what and where exactly mind is, across all sections of societies and branches of science in the world, though it has supreme spiritual and scientific significance.

There is variety of beliefs about mind, one of which is – it is integral part of the physical body; but it leaves the body when a man dies and enters new life. How and why are unclear! Another school of thoughts or even some faiths state that mind is metaphysical; physically does not reside in our body and is controlled by divine forces. Whatever we may believe, one thing is certain mind is a powerful Maya (illusion) and mirage!

 Most widely acceptable idea is that mind is closely linked to the brain; it cannot be physically observed but its effect can be seen and captured through our brain and nervous system. Whatever comes to our mind – images or thoughts, gets stored in the memory of our brain. Our brain has 3 types of memories – sensory, short term and long term, the combination of which ensures encoding of incoming information, storage and retrieval like a computer.

Some of hard realities are that your mind is only linked to you and hence, it cannot be an entity which is separate from you. When you say “Me and my mind”, does it mean 2 separate entities? They are not; both are one and same. You get confused simply because you have to observe as well as assess by one and same one entity i.e. mind!

Rules of mind

  1. Power of mind of all normal human beings is the same!
    Power of mind of the wealthiest person – Bill Gates is no different than that of a poor person or that of highly intelligent person like Einstein to ace golfer Tiger Woods!! The difference lies in degree of its use or misuse.
  2. What differs from person to person is response of mind in identical situations!
    It is totally dependent on past memory of the person.
  3. State of mind is determined by your current thoughts, which is mix of present and past images or memories.
  4. What you would do next is linked to what you are thinking now.
  5. What would happen to you next is largely influenced by how are you perceiving or contemplating now.
    If you are having positive or good state of mind, positive things would happen; good news would come. If you are frustrated, unfolding events would make you more frantic! Most time, you have mixed thoughts which you seldom realize and therefore, mixed results appear, leaving you wondering why that has happened even when you were positive. Fact was that you had mixed state of mind.
  6. Once a thought or image comes in your mind, you can’t erase it!
    All you can do is to allow other thoughts to superimpose on it and that way you get a feeling that you have forgotten it. But remember, it can still surface in future.
  7. Thoughts, which your mind allows to get linked to your sensory or nervous system, become your notions or emotions!
    These would surface in your mind repetitively. This is how your traits, habits or beliefs are formed.
  8. More you try to forcefully remove or repel unwanted thoughts in your mind, more would these resist and persist!
    Only way to remove unwanted thoughts is to allow them to come but ignore!!

Efficient use of mind power

From above it is clear that mind has full role in kind of efforts you make and effects that you realize. It is your mind driving, if you experience:

  • Success or sorrow
  • Ecstasy or enmity
  • Fun or frustration
  • Happiness or hurt
  • Optimism or pessimism

Few things that you can do to make good use of your mind power are:

  1. Practice to focus on just single thoughts.
  2. Observe your thoughts; but don’t obstruct same.
  3. Ignore “conflicts of thoughts” or “unwanted ones” as much as you can.
  4. Stop to live in past.
  5. Reinforce only wanted thoughts.
  6. Repetitively emphasize in your mind that nothing negative, however tempting or justifying, would ever help. It can only hurt!
  7. Align most of your actions towards your happiness, health and goals of your life.

So, it is all about and in your mind! If you follow above, you are sure to get command on your life or destiny!

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How our beliefs & habits get built and why we need to break some!

Source: http://www.flickr.com/

Our beliefs build our character and habits shape our personality! Are our beliefs or habits gifts from destiny/divinity or products from our genes or DNA? Many tend to believe that it is; but that is not true. Our genes or DNA may influence some tendencies e.g. not recognizing impending dangers like legendary car racer – Michael Schumacher, being fearful or sensitive to changes. Most beliefs and habits get built unconsciously through our life time; though some form through our conscious efforts.

One of my former colleagues was very messy and disorganized; albeit very creative. His supervisor arranged couple of training programs to change him; but that would not have much impact. Subsequently, he got an opportunity to go to Germany on deputation for 2 year assignment. When he returned back, he had dramatically changed in his habits. He would keep his office highly organized and pay attention to every details. He became very conscious of what he would do; though this change came at the expense of his creativity!

On changing beliefs, there are several real stories on how life of famous or ordinary people saw a dramatic difference in their beliefs like believer of violence to become non-violent or honest ones becoming dishonest when faced with difficulties.

Above substantiates the fact that habits are what you harbor and beliefs are what you build! And when you build, you also acquire capability to break!!

How habits and beliefs are formed

Seed of habit or belief is an idea, which comes in your mind as a sequel to your observation. If this idea comes repetitively in your mind through seeing, reading, listening or thinking, it gets rooted in your mind.

Those ideas or thoughts, which result into physical activities on a repetitive basis becomes your habits. These physical activities do mean that your body sensory and nervous systems would work in sync with such thoughts. Thoughts, which remain mental but repetitive, become your beliefs. Beliefs would drive or impact your behavior and other ideas.

Why habits?

If you go back to early phase of evolution of human race or any other living being, habits were formed only for 2 basic reasons – Health and Safety. But, you consciously or unconsciously form many more habits, which have no relation with your health and safety e.g. getting angry when something does not get done, putting hands in pockets of trouser while talking to someone, lying down on sofa while watching TV and so on. Why do you need these habits? You never raise questions.

Observe carefully – habits, which have nothing to do to secure good health and safety, are either harmful or hurt your efficiency! These would kill your focus or health itself like smoking or taste for junk food!!

Why beliefs?

Original idea behind beliefs getting formed or developed is always that it gives you happiness or in layman’s term – peace of mind or comfort level. It is only later that belief which was meant to give happiness, takes shape of faith, fundamentalism or fanaticism!

All beliefs, which are not linked to your happiness, are actually banes! Belief of a boss that by empowering his employees, he would lose power is bunk. It is not aimed at happiness; it is meant to boost his ego, since he wants employees to gravitate towards him by becoming center of power. People seldom notice amount of beliefs that they hold, which are farcical, including so called corporate virtue – being paranoid!

Also, every belief has an ugly side – loss of openness and flexibility.

Challenge your habits and beliefs

If you find that your decency and dexterity do not deliver results, your honesty hurts, your sincerity sticks or you are trailing behind your peers despite terrific work, it certainly requires you to challenge and change your some of the habits and beliefs!

It is extremely relevant that –

  1. Your habits must be only those which would endure your health and safety.
  2. Your beliefs should only what would bring you happiness and do not hurt others.

Believe that it is only you who have built your habits and beliefs. What gets built also gets broken. Do not believe any psychiatrist, psychologist or physician, if they say or write to the contrary. You may need to overcome resistance that your mind can create. People have no clue how wrong habits hurt and beliefs belie what otherwise belong to you!

It is now high time that you take stock of and audit your habits and beliefs, list all those, which do not meet above 2 criteria and make an action plan to discard those gradually and with conviction.

You can’t imagine how you would rejuvenate and redeem yourself by realigning or
relinquishing irrelevant habits and beliefs!

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Many try to trade off good karmas with grim ones; does that work?

Karma is a relatively new addition to English dictionary; so for the sake of clarity, let me explain its basic meaning. Karma means one’s deeds, doings or thoughts and effect, which one would experience as a result of the same.

Our life embodies karma and therefore, life and karma are inseparable. Karma is completely secular and scientific. Regardless of our beliefs or faiths, karma impacts everyone. Simplest example is you do good, result can’t be anything but good. If anyone argues to the contrary, it is nothing but illusion in understanding.

In day to day life, despite best of our intentions, we land up doing something wrong and then we try to compensate it by consciously or vociferously doing next few things right.

Does that really work?

Effect of bad is not equal to that of good!

Some years back, my supervisor, who was located in overseas country, planned a visit to Pune with his wife. I advised my secretary to book a hotel room and make sure that it is kept ready in time on day of arrival. I myself went to hotel to receive guests; but found that hotel staff had not kept the room ready despite reminder. Since it was taking too long to arrange the room, I got upset on reception staff. Then, they rushed and arranged the room.

I had good rapport with my supervisor, as my organization was always exceeding the targets. About 4 years later, during my routine meeting with supervisor, he suddenly mentioned to me for first time that he did not like the way I got upset on hotel staff during aforesaid trip. This set me to ponder whether I was so bad when I got upset, even though I was making sure that hotel staff does a minimum for my guests what was promised. In retrospect, it seemed to me that getting upset probably was not a good idea, since it left such scar in memory of my supervisor, which would not go away even after 4 years!

Let us take example of serving customers. You may have delivered to your customer 99 times on time and with quality; but if you fail 100th time, all what has been done previously would be washed away and in addition, one bad incident would reverberate may be another 99 times!

Why nature has a heavy bias for banes

Realities of world we live in are:

  1. Our primary needs are health, happiness, hopes and safety, all of which are possible, if we are positive.
    We are very sensitive to anything, which would threaten these i.e. negative deeds.
  2. Above always highlights negativity in far greater proportion than positivity!
  3. Despite knowing fully well that anything negative is not good, we have natural tendency to lean on it!
    This paradox is borne out of the fact that anything negative is consequence of our emotions, based upon past memories which reside in our mind like a cache memory of a computer!
    This means negativity tends to surface effortlessly!!
  4. To be good or positive requires efforts, since it is borne out of our consciousness.
  5. Effects of being wrong or negative lasts much longer and so are the consequences!

Abandon trading off good with grim or bad

  1. You are bound to face constant insinuation or inclination towards what is negative or bad – anger, anxiety, fear, frustration, greed, guilt, hurting others etc. and succumb to same!
  2. You know what is good and do go for it; but not as often as you should!
  3. Now a new fact:
    What is worst is to trade off or mix point 2 with 1 above!!
    Many believe trading off would lessen their loss; it actually increases.
    Belief that trading off would work brings many back to bad deeds with vengeance!
    Majority thinks it is its moral responsibility to do good to compensate for bad. This is bunk! Here below is why:
    1. When you trade off, you can never see clear image and implication of its constituents – positive and negative or good and bad. You only get a mixed or diluted picture.
    2. On the other hand, when you don’t trade off, you can actually see both parts as stand-alone.
      It is only then that you can truly understand greatness of one (positive) and gravity of another (negative)!
    3. No sooner you have clarity on 2 opposites; you would be able to master managing both.
      You surely need this, because life exists only because positives and negatives co-exist!

So, truth is on your table – trading off 2 opposites is biggest source of your troubles and traumas. Treat good and bad or positive and negative in stand-alone modes. Then, you would be inspired to meticulously manage both and make it merry!

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