Tag Archives: Perfectionist

Secrets behind why happy-go-lucky people are usually healthy!

Being Happy-go-lucky! Source: http://www.flickr.com/

By happy-go-lucky people, I don’t mean those, who are thick skin, carefree, care-the-less or who appear to keep themselves aloof from pain but not from pleasure! I am referring to those people, who keep themselves happy and able to manage their stress well!

I am sure that you know some happy-go-lucky people. To understand what they do and what works for them, let us first look at following examples:

  1. Doctors rarely fall prey to diseases they treat!
    Practicing doctors rarely fail to attend to their duties. They usually do not pick-up infections from the patients they treat. Popular belief is that by getting exposed to infections repetitively, they become immune and that they take precautionary measures like washing their hands after checking their patients etc. But, many doctors are not known to take such precautionary measures. Then, there are several social workers, whose pursuit is to meet patients, spend time with them and boost their morals. Even these noble workers hardly get impacted by illness of patients!
    There seems to be no scientific explanation how frequent exposure to infections enhances your immunity! But, one thing is strikingly similar among doctors and social workers – they don’t get disturbed and distracted from diseases; for them, it is just a routine!
  2. Why doctors’ evergreen advice in every illness “Be happy; you would be o.k.”?
    You must have noticed this! Doctors do try to create optimism and hopes in their patients!! I have witnessed many, who have faith in their doctors, recover much faster than those, who doubt them. Why?
    It is certain that optimism and hopefulness help your health!
  3. Military people invariably enjoy and sustain sound health!
    Fitness exercises and hard work definitely help maintain good health. But, there are lot of civilians, who are health freaks but don’t seem to benefit as much as military people do. What is worth noting is that military people are healthy; but not necessarily happy!
    There is one stark difference military personnel have as opposed to civilians – they are much focused and don’t allow themselves to get distracted in normal course!
  4. Saintly people are seldom sick!
    They are calm, less complicated and have minimum conflicts of thoughts! Their wants or needs are very little. The net result is a stress free life and that seems to be key to their good health.
  5. During exciting time, excellent health endures like that of bride and bridegroom at time of their wedding!
    When you are truly excited or having a hearty laugh, your body releases such hormones, which make your immune system stronger. At such time, you suddenly find yourself very focused and free from worries!

Now, signs that happy-go-lucky people emit

Compare the above examples with the clear signs, happy-go-lucky people reflect:

  1. They are free from stress or manage their stress well.
  2. They don’t overtly get disturbed by distractions.
  3. They are optimistic and hence dislike company of pessimists.
  4. They strike good balance between work and life.
  5. They are not perfectionists.
  6. They are able to minimize struggle with self.
  7. They take on the life as it comes.
  8. They avoid being furious or frustrated.
  9. They don’t allow dust of doubt and rust of past to set-in!
  10. They never nag and always enjoy what they eat!!

So, we can safely conclude that happy-go-lucky persons are unique combination of unique qualities of medical practitioners, military men to saints and stimulated ones! We often confuse with superficially happy-go-lucky ones, who are complacent, care free or careless, casual or enjoying being in comfort zones! Such people have misplaced happiness.

It is noteworthy that happy people are invariably healthy; but healthy people are not necessarily happy and therefore, eventually they lose good health!

How to be happy-go-lucky!

  1. Gainfully engaged mind brings wellness; whereas idle mind triggers illness!
    As a matter of fact, mind can never remain idle. Typically, when we say idle mind, we mean no physical activity; but our mind is actually busy with conflicting thoughts. A gainfully engaged mind would automatically drive you to do productive work!
  2. Cut down unproductive thoughts and tasks.
    At least half of what we think and do is wasteful. Please look at earlier article on “Want to free-up your time by 50%? Follow just 5 tips fiercely!” Very significant to know here is if you do something wasteful, it is bound to bring associated worries.
  3. Acceptance of “what it is” and feeling gratitude for “what you have” are two great mantras to keep you away from disappointments and dejection.
  4. Welcome problems but work for solutions.
    You may find it difficult to welcome problems; but points 1 and 3 above would act as great enablers.
  5. Whatever happens has both positive and negative built-in. If you tag along with positive, you would be terrific; otherwise it can be terrible!
  6. It may be very surprising but true that full focus and faith in what you pursue is key to “full-of-fun life”!

Being happy-go-lucky surely boosts your immune system and more importantly not allow you to become unhealthy!

So, if you are not happy-go-lucky by destiny or DNA, you can definitely be so by design!!!

Read More

How can you tame and translate your troubles/problems into opportunities!

Without exception, all leadership disciplines and discourses delve and coax you to see opportunity in very problem. You agree and resolve to do so; yet, you keep getting troubled and overwhelmed by problems. You helplessly watch one problem bringing another and make you more frustrated!

Why is that all leadership, sane or saintly advices keep going for a toss?

No one wants to live with problems; but everyone keeps them alive!

Let us face the bitter truth – nearly all of us live with large gap between our lip and life! Knowingly, no one wants to prompt a problem; but unknowingly, nearly everyone ends up promoting one.

I know of several people, who have unwittingly started liking the company of problems and troubles. On a given day, if they have a smoother ride, they feel uncomfortable or unusual and get itch to involve in some ruckus!

Perfectionists see problems in most things; picky ones get troubled by a drop from their hat! And majority does not have patience to pursue problems further. So notwithstanding complete dislike, people resign to live with problems. I would attribute such scenario to 3 main reasons:

  1. Living in comfort zone of either sympathy or excuses, which people elicit when in trouble.
  2. Inertia to change.
  3. Lack of definition of the problem or inability to do so.

Do not be surprised, majority falls in 3rd category! We like to live in gray zones and make ourselves believe that we are not part of the problem!!

Sources of major troubles/problems

  1. Non-acceptance of things or people as they are; in other words non-acceptance of realities
    Most people are perpetually engaged in questioning what is real. They would not accept what has happened. If an employee has performed poorly, boss would nag and needle.
    By such attitude, you only throw suspicion or make a person feel guilty, instead of encouraging a remedy or resolution.
  2. Miscommunications
    Many people suffer due to inadequate or inaccurate communication. If bias gets developed between supervisor and sub-ordinate, you and your spouse or beloved, first casualty would be communication!
    If we sit to analyze, we would be aghast to see troubles, communication causes!
  3. Being judgmental
    We are best lawyer for our mistakes and best judges for others’ mistakes. Then, mistake or no mistake, we derive pleasure in passing comments.
    Vast majority has tendency for presumptions and creating perceptions, which could be often false or bereft of facts.
  4. Desires disproportionate to what you deserve
    Simple fact of life – you don’t get what you desire; you can only get what you deserve. Yet, we would put our greed above God!
    It is very easy to create wants; but you also create worries in same proportions at the same time!!

Paradigm shift a must for how you perceive a problem!

Despite all advancements in education systems, knowledge areas and management programs, there is one fatal flaw – coaching for how problems should be perceived. Here below is what needs to be understood:

  • It is good that a problem surfaces; otherwise, it can cause damage beyond repair! Hidden problem is like body ailment, which if remains undetected can turn out to be much more problematic with associated side effects.
    So, never get put-off or panic when problems crop up.
  • Do not defer a problem or trouble that you face to heavenly hands!
  • Problem must be defined! If you cannot do that, take help of a mentor or doctor, a teacher or preacher.
  • Neither like nor dislike a problem! This is most crucial.
  • Just observe and be conscious of problem or trouble that exists.

When you follow the above, you would automatically discover a good or effective solution. It is a mystery; but at the same time a reality! Try it; but do this sincerely. Never fake around it.

Normally, there is illusion that by breaking head, you can break open a solution. You do not; you do it when you become just an observer, even when you are the affected person! Biggest benefit from addressing your problems is that you definitely emerge as a better person!

Opportunities are created, when you reach root causes!

When you recognize, define and observe a problem, you can find its solution. Moment you find a solution; you can and must take one further step – to understand causes at its roots.

Root causes are where your opportunities lie! You are losing in stock market or on your investments; know the reasons and you can create a winning streak. That is how Warren Buffet has risen to be one of the wealthiest persons. All areas related to remedies or resolutions of root causes constitute your opportunities. Pick any or all and you can design your destiny.

Is the necessity mother of inventions? Think over! Necessity creates an unfulfilled urge, which is nothing but seen by us as a problem. So, necessity is mother of a problem!! And problem is the mother of inventions or innovations!!!

If we dive into depth of how internet and wireless technologies have evolved as an example, we would discover that it is passion to solve one problem after another, which has led to such innovations and created unprecedented opportunities for all of us.

So, if you have problems or troubles, then you can know root causes and if you know root causes, you would discover an ocean of opportunities!

Read More

Perfection promotes Problems!

There is something seriously wrong about our ideas for Perfection. Not sure how many are conscious or clear what to attempt, when they suggest or swear to be perfect! Also, be cautious to understand rationale behind the above caption – it does not imply “imperfection is to be inculcated”. This applies to companies, institutions, and individuals, as also work, hard and soft skills, products or services.

Implications of Perfection

  1. Efforts for 90% of perfection are doable with diligence and dedication; next 5% are harder; next 3% are harrowing; but balance 1.9% is herculean!
    Is there anything like 100% perfection? One does not know and let us leave balance 0.1% to aliens from outer space!
  2. It is time guzzler and hence, also goofs on good opportunities.
  3. It is not efficient and hence expensive.
  4. It requires lot of practice, patience and polishing, at the cost of productivity. Therefore, population of perfectionists cannot be large.
  5. Many desire and dream perfection; in practice very few can drive it!
    Therefore, it is devoid of popular appeal.
  6. Perfectionists are isolationists.
  7. Perfect bodies, beauties or businesses could prove to be bane, as these would attract lot of attention, rivals, imitators and hence, their real values would wane over time!

Be free from Defects, instead of being Perfect!

To be free from defects or flaws is a completely different paradigm as well as perspective than to be perfect. Drive to be free from defects takes away all problems associated with process of perfection!

Above has shown that to be perfect could be an ordeal; below would show that to be free from defect is ideal!

  • Process of getting perfection does not mandatorily target defects removal; whereas making it free from defects – be it product, system, service, character, competences, lifestyle or else, focuses fully on weeding away defects first!
    Former is analogous to “knowing what you should do, having little concern or knowledge of what you should not do” and hence, as a result, you would also do wrong things and then spend efforts to correct the same, which is wasteful! Latter is equivalent to learning first what you should not do; so what you do would automatically be free from flaws and hence most productive.
  • Definition of defects depends upon “functional requirements” in case of objects/ activities and “what creates good impact on others and self”, in case of personal behavior/characteristics.
  • When you remove all defects or keep it free from defects, you would find that resultant output is highly functional, acceptable, suitable and economical.
  • When an object or subject becomes defect free, it becomes simple and beautiful! Further attempts to bring what we term as perfection, actually make it complicated and starts spoiling its elegance and élan! From that stage onwards, output starts to plateau and time/costs start to soar.
  • Efforts should, then, be directed at innovations or variations to create different versions or flavors. That would be most efficient and economically sustainable!

Let us look at 2 simple examples to explain relevance of above:

By removing all impurities from drinking water, we make it potable. Further attempts to perfectly clean it, would remove minerals and that would not be good for health!

2nd example – Head of an organization is preparing communication on company performance for employees. Defect free communication would be one, which would be simple to understand, short to digest and sweet to appreciate.

Instead, if he vies to make it perfect by putting all performance data, graphs, explanations for up and down sides and so on, such communication would no doubt have depth and details; but consume lot of time and man hours to prepare and would turn out to be complex. In most cases, it cannot be communicated transparently and effectively, and would leave audience guessing and gasping to grasp!

For the Future Perfect…

The mandate is clear:

  1. Redefine “Perfection”.
  2. Efforts for perfection should cease, once all defects or flaws are removed.
  3. Any extra effort is like a creamy layer at the expense of volume (of efforts), without creating value.
  4. Instead, such extra efforts should be directed for innovations, new creations and versions.
  5. Objects and subjects, body and being become the best and beautiful, when these are free from flaws.
    These are also, then, exquisite, elegant, efficient, affordable and sustainable!
  6. Attempts to make things 100% perfect could push you to perils!
  7. Nature’s laws demand minor (not major) degree of imperfections and imbalances. This is what has made whole universe in a dynamic state. It also brings fizz and fervor in our life!
Read More