Tag Archives: Addiction

Our day to day dilemma or delusion – Schrödinger’s cat is dead or alive?

yes-nein-or-yein

Yes, Nein or Yein? Image source – flickr.com

My wife is a cleaning freak and is currently on house cleaning spree because of upcoming major Indian festival. I had been expecting that any day my bedroom cupboard would be upside down, albeit organized as is where basis by her standard. But, it had not happened.

Today morning, I walked down to my cupboard to fetch some article expecting least what I witnessed – it was cleaned up, reorganized and I found it hard to lay my hands of what I wanted. I began to feel upset. But, I said to myself – hang on; this is nothing new. It is just my dilemma or delusion whether I would find Schrödinger’s cat dead or alive. Cat is dead; just accept the reality that cupboard has been reorganized regardless of my comfort or discomfort.

You must be facing likes of above situation a number of times every day. If your cell phone rings when you don’t want to be disturbed, your mind would instantly suspect caller to be one, you don’t want to talk to; but majority of times it would be another person, whom you won’t refuse to talk. Your spouse insists upon you to accompany for shopping and you put extra money not for spending but for not cutting a sorry figure. More often, you would find whole money gets spent, as if your spouse or shopkeepers had prior knowledge of extra money in your pocket.

So, your mind is constantly engaged in tossing the coin – would it be this or that?

Splendid substance behind story of Schrödinger’s cat!

I won’t go into technical or experimental aspects of this story; if you are interested, please go on Google. It is very easy and interesting to understand. What is very important here is to know that such simple idea has led to monumental advancements in every field – technology to physiology. Schrödinger stated that there is no way to know in advance whether the cat, which has been placed in safe part of a chamber but facing threat from unsafe part, is dead or alive unless you observe or open the chamber. If you don’t observe, then cat is neither dead nor alive; it is in state of superposition – a term which Schrödinger or science does not know till today what exactly it is – call it metaphysical. Ironically, many argue that there is unseen force or mechanism in our universe that has prior knowledge.

What Schrödinger or science could not fathom till today is – this idea has great relevance in our day to day life. Most refuse to believe there is science behind our life and there is always life behind science.

Sum and substance of this story

Things, which are in our thoughts or are unseen, have equal probability of actually being alive or dead, this or that, right or wrong, great or gory, successful or setback. Only when things surface or become reality, then we see them in one or another form.

So, game of guessing or tossing the coin that we continuously play is actually futile. There is equal chance that things would turn out to be positive or negative. Your wishing that they be positive does not make you positive; actually it is negative contrary to popular perceptions as that indicates your obsession or addiction to positive. And, if you want it be negative even for a positive reason, it is negative as it indicates your bias or prejudice.

Now comes important link from last week’s post, which is not only proven in life but also by science’s famous law of Complementarity. This law states – you would get result as per type of set up to measure it. Such set up is physical in science but mental in life.

Therefore, if you guess or toss the coin, you are negative and that increases chances of negative results or disappointments. But, if you don’t guess, you are positive (which actually implies you are prepared to accept the reality) and you have higher chances of getting delightful results.

Try above game without cheating; you would be astonished with astounding results!

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It’s great to be good; but getting addicted to it is worse than addiction to bad

 

When leader turns a laggard!

When leader turns a laggard!

Highly successful individuals, industries or institutions suddenly come in limelight for a lame reason and their character or credentials take a severe beating. Among innumerable instances, current ones are Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt for their marital issues, Volkswagen for emission scandal and past ones are golf legend Tiger Woods, soccer star Diego Maradona, iconic companies like Dell and BlackBerry. In all of these cases, success brought successes and fame bought more feathers in their caps, but only to fall or fly apart.

Why is such story is so sacrosanct is every case?

When going is good, everyone has natural urge to have more of it. You see your success as vindication or validation of what you do. There is nothing wrong in this but slowly your mind abstains to see adverse implications of blind pursuit of good. I call this as “addiction to good”.

Why addiction to bad is a lesser evil

If you get addicted to anything that is bad, you would get early warning signals. Your bad behavior would raise eyebrows of your boss and buddies alike. Your bad habits would show up on your health and happiness. So, you receive lot of alarms when you do something that is not good and get opportunity to correct. If you don’t correct, you would end up with bigger crisis. That gives you last opportunity to resurrect or else ruin.

Why addiction to good is an enormous evil

When you do it right, everyone around you is there to endorse and enamor what you do. You start to get results. It turns into your passion. When you keep pursuing, it potentially turns into your obsession. Two things happen at this stage – (1) you build a blind belief on the approach that gave you success. Often there are errors in interpreting the parameters of this successful approach like picking emotions in place of inspiration, hard work instead of smart work and like and (2) you see your stakes soaring high socially and professionally.

You start to firmly believe, once right, you would always be right. You refuse to see incoming arrogance and overconfidence. Unsuccessful or unaware colleagues or masses start to idolize you, fueling your obsession further. This is the stage, you begin to inflict severe damage to social or corporate fabric with intelligence and resources that you have gathered. Your blessings turn into banes and you become victim of your own victories. Unless you face a severe setback, you are actually at a point of no return.

Are advanced societies becoming victim of addiction to good?

It very much seems so.

Advanced societies or countries in our world have had good run for substantial time, during which knowingly or unknowingly, they seem to taken decisions, adopted practices and policies, which helped them earlier but hurting them now. They are failing to fathom developing scenario. Addiction to good does give rise to right wing individuals, leaders and parties, if Brexit or US presidential election is any indication!

So, it is great to be good but gruesome to get addicted to it.

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How to accelerate arrival of your golden or defining moments!

Arrival of golden moment! Source: http://www.flickr.com/

(Credit for this post goes to one of the guests visiting this website, who inspired me to pen it.)

Everyone experiences his/her golden or defining moment once or several times during life time. Such moment or turning point is an extremely important event, when you feel a step change in your paradigm! To many, defining moments are very conspicuous; whereas others may not be conscious of same. However, if you become aware of golden moments’ arrival, you can reap rich dividends.

Defining moment of Mahatma Gandhi came on 7th June, 1893, when he, the 24 year old Indian lawyer in South Africa, was forcibly ejected out of a train by local authorities in middle of night and winter for holding valid ticket for first-class compartment but refusing to move to third-class. Immediate aftermath of this incidence gave birth to future leader of unprecedented non-violence movement that no one else could imagine earlier!

Defining moment of iconic tennis player Steffi Graf came not by winning first time Wimbledon final, but by beating then world’s no. 1 ranked player Martina Navratilova in Lipton Cup semifinal in 1987!

Let me share 2 of several defining moments, which I have experienced so far. 1st one came, when I was in 4th standard in school and my class teacher came to meet my mother. Being afraid of her, I had hidden myself; but I heard her complaining that I am not good at studies. That moment changed my academic performance down side up for years to come. Next one came for a very strange reason. Having score good marks, I had to apply for 5 year engineering graduation under family pressure, though my core interest was to go for research in physics. I then tried to fail myself in 1st year by deliberately not preparing well (not an honest act!) and demonstrate to my family that engineering is no good for me. Yet I passed through. That fateful day taught me “Nothing is impossible”!

What happens, when defining moments arrive?

  1. All pieces of your erstwhile puzzle or struggle fall in place to hand over success to you!
  2. You experience a step change in your paradigm and perspective! 
  3. Bright light of thoughts signals the end of dark tunnel, you have been in.
  4. You feel inspired and incredibly confident.
  5. You are truly ready to let go your past and start a fresh lease of life.
  6. You experience new energy and new balancing point of your life/pursuits.
  7. You indeed start to see obstacles as pieces of opportunities!
  8. Optimism and openness displace obscurities!
  9. You would experience outburst of emotions or euphoria!

So, your defining moment reveals your real-self! It unleashes your hidden potential!!

What brings your defining/golden moments!

There are a variety of situations:

  1. When series of setbacks eventually land you with success.
  2. When you are at the brink of a crisis or disaster, but you are able to bounce back.
  3. After breaking-down, you get breakthrough!
  4. After strenuous journey, you reach a scenic destination.
  5. You encounter severe adversity; but your solid efforts bring you excellence!
  6. Your intense endeavors lead to innovations!
  7. Your focused efforts, even in event of failures, start giving you fruits! 

Invariably golden moments arrive when your struggle with negative situations starts to deliver success; from lows, you experience highs; odds translate into opportunities! When you are stuck with your work or relationship, your sincerity appears to have lost significance, you are deprived of what you deserve, results are remote and then suddenly you see things starting to fall in place and your hopes begin to build, is when your golden moments arrive!

Now, how to accelerate the arrival!

Yes; you have power to accelerate!

Rule# 1

Never become negative, when negative events overtake!

Look around; negative news always get highlighted. Masses do mistake of dealing or greeting difficulties with anxiety, anger, frustration, impatience and pessimism. You would be under tremendous pressure from your own mind to follow what you normally witness; but never succumb to this temptation.

Rule# 2

Don’t flick between negatives and positives!

This is where most goof. Facing odds, they somehow gather courage and make genuine efforts. But, when results don’t show up, they go back and squander what they did. Hold on resolutely to the right, come what may! You must double your drive against negativity until it diminishes.

Rule# 3

Never give up hope for good!

Under pressure, you would have every reason to believe that manipulation, greed or evil survives; but history shows that is never ever!

Rule# 4

When good arrives, don’t get addicted to it!

Good is alluring, especially if it comes after bad and you would tend to get addicted to it. Don’t get obsessed with good results; you would forget what you did to get that and then go back. Think having or being good is just a normal way of your life!

Rule# 5 

Live in present and for goals of your life!

No matter what is your preaching or learning, fact is no one being or thing is more important than this to you! Mere intentions would be harmful; but implementation would be heavenly!!

Rule# 6

Do not stumble due to step change! 

When such moments arrive, many fall in utter disbelief! They don’t manage such momentous moments well. They become ecstatic, get ego boost or go overboard and in the process, they bugger it up! Embrace this change with élan and humility. Endure it to bring new order in your career or life!!

So, why not glitter your life by attracting your golden moments?

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Want to free-up your time by 50%? Follow just 5 tips fiercely!

Where the hell time is? Source: http://www.flickr.com/

“I have no time to relax!”, “Work is too taxing!!”, “I wish I had time for what I always wanted to do most!!!” and lot more things to lament for lack of time.

This is usual chore of current time. People, who work responsibly, get more responsibilities making it harder for them to get spare time. However those, who do not have responsibilities, also don’t have time!

Then, we are saddled with lopsided notions in corporate life to conserve time – multi-tasking improves productivity; dynamism means doing work faster; it is good to load employees so much that they have no time to digress!

Computerization and IT advancements have provided terrific means to save time in every field; yet all of us seem to be running short on time. Consistent with Parkinson’s Law, we have stretched ourselves to utilize time freed up by new tools and techniques for doing what we should, as also what we should not! Despite all modern means to rejig the way we do our work, we have not rejigged the most powerful tool we possess – our mind!

Here are 5 tips, which can shake your life, simplify your engagement and save you 50% or more time:

  1. Don’t struggle with self!
    This is a vicious virus, which eats most into your energy and time.
    When you don’t get what you want, rather than targeting causes and their effects or your efforts, you target yourself. You feel dejected and disappointed, and blame yourself. It derails your focus and damages your confidence.
    “Struggle with self” is essentially “Conflict of your thoughts”, more than 80% of which comes from your ego, envy and biases! If you would dilute or drop these 3 parameters, not only that you would stop struggling with self, you would also rediscover your energy, efficiency and speed. It would make your time far more purposeful and peaceful! It would also encourage you to trust others and delegate part of your responsibilities.
  2. Accept what it is
    We often waste lot of time by not accepting what has happened or what has become a reality. By not coming to terms with what is real, we simply get stuck, engage ourselves to challenge, argue and hence, find it hard to move forward.
    It is foolhardy to react against, remorse and recount a reality. There are several side effects of non-acceptance of “what it is” – we develop habit of guessing, grumping and gossiping. We would spend lot of time just to narrate, explain or defend things.
    Only when we accept what it is, we promptly move forward, be able to select a right response and seek a solution, if required. It saves us from frustration and fighting for what is frivolous!
  3. Don’t spend too much time on your spouse and dear ones
    Surprised at this advice? Please notice “too much…”!
    Your spouse and dear ones deserve your quality time. Quantity and quality do not go hand in hand! Real relationship requires balance between quality and quantity!
    However irony is that when you like someone, you start to give more time than desired. When you come closer than a respectable distance, your relationship develops cracks and consequently, it comes on rocks. Time spent that far goes for a toss and it would cost you a bomb of time to salvage!
    Your loved ones merit freedom, space and time! If you give that, you not only save your relationship but also time!
  4. Don’t get addicted to anything!
    You cannot imagine how your addiction to anything takes toll on your time!
    Addiction to what bad is bad; but, addiction to what is good is also bad. When you get addicted to work, you lose balance of life; when you get addicted to successes, you start to grapple with setbacks; if you become addicted to helping people, you are bound to hurt self. I am amazed to see how people confuse obsession as passion or inspiration, misunderstand addiction to work as dedication and misinterpret blind faith as facts of life! Remember, addiction brings compulsion!!
    If you start doing things as a matter of choice and not as compulsion, do what you should and not what you have to, it would rejuvenate your approach, energy and enthusiasm. You would be far more efficient and effective!
  5. Allow things to go wrong!
    It is not possible that you can control everything. What has to go wrong would go wrong in any case! Be aware that control freaks spend or smoke much more time than who are control-free!
    If you know something is going wrong but is beyond your control, then let it go wrong. I have seen people often breaking their head, without applying their head first. Where you believe your intervention or efforts would help things from going bad, make maximum of 3 attempts sincerely. If it improves, fine; otherwise let it fail.
    Do you know, sometimes things going wrong is a necessity? Look at many leaders, neighbors or peers. When they come at loggerheads, no wise counsel gets into their heads, except of a crisis! But, before such a crisis crops up, colossal amount of time and money is wasted!!
    So, it is good to go down at times, to get a better grip on you do.

Then, you can use some cherries on top of above tips – put in place things that prick you most without losing time, avoid arguments and give good time and thoughts to plan your work.

Why not try above tips, which I can assure you would work better than any modern time management tool and give you enormous freedom and free time?

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You need right recipe to get great results; but getting addicted to it is regressing!

Recipe of Bill Clinton was right during his 1st term as US President and therefore, he got success in getting elected for 2nd term, during which he apparently got addicted to it. Therefore, he failed to notice which ingredient of that recipe was going wrong and got into serious troubles in his relationships! Michael Dell made a great beginning when he founded Dell Corporation. His approach had all ingredients to make Dell an iconic company and that happened. But, what is happening to it for last few years shows that ingredient of “confidence and conviction” in Michael Dell’s recipe have become excessive in proportion and therefore, he overlooked how tablets and smart phones are changing market dynamics. That is proving to be very regressive for “Once a great Corporation!”

This happens with most Celebrities most of the times. They do it right when they start, get success, name and fame. And then, land up in rehabilitation centers!!

What really happens, when recipe starts giving results

Success of an individual, group, company, institution or country does not come just by a single parameter like luck or fluke; but by a bunch of parameters. These parameters or ingredients form what I have called here as recipe. When it is right, it gives success; conversely if you get success, your recipe, in other words your efforts have to be necessarily right.

Look at the recipe of a successful leader –

  1. Focus and ownership
  2. Courage and ability to take challenges or risks
  3. Confidence and conviction
  4. Perseverance and ability to create impact
  5. Open to change and listening to others

Recipe of a successful expert –

  1. Focus and ownership
  2. Attention to details and analytical
  3. Confidence and conviction
  4. Passion and diligence
  5. Taking no chances and drive for perfection

Both leader and expert (in any field – engineering, medical, science or philosophy) are bound to get success with above recipe, provided proportions of above 5 ingredients are correct in each case. But, when either of them get addicted to this recipe, then some of the ingredients would be thrown out of proportion.

As an example, with series of successes, a leader’s ownership would go up and turn into obsession and becoming excessively protective or control freak. Confidence of both leader and expert would change to over-confidence and move further to arrogance! Passion of an expert would prompt him/her towards insanity and inflexibility. Leader’s prominence or popularity would attract people and his courage would encourage him to establish new but wrong relationships!

Right recipe has risk of addiction

A right recipe, which gives great returns, is like right mix in making a cocktail and you can easily get addicted to it, unless you are conscious or mindful! Addiction always boosts your appetite!! That’s when your gains go into your head and feet go above ground!!!

Paradox is that you definitely need a right recipe to get success; but then you also run the risk of converting success into failure!

Right recipe has risk of creating confusion!

Don’t be surprised at this! This is true!!

Success breeds successes. If you do it always right, you would get more of successes. It is like having one great idea and then the doors of many more getting opened. You would get confused, which one to get in and which ones to let go.

I have witnessed many (people) and for myself that when successes start, a series of those would queue up. Those can choke your way; you would get overwhelmed and get confused how to manage them.

You can look around the world and you would find that successful people are always on the run, falling short of time and finally, they run out of ideas when their downfall starts!

Main pitfall from above is that you get distracted from your eventual goal/s and get diverted from your other priorities. That would deliver a blow and not blessing!

The Remedy

  • Develop taste for Efforts, not for End-results!
  • Put your belief in ingredients i.e. your qualities/characteristics and their right mix. That automatically leads to right recipe and then results.
    That would keep you free from Addiction and Confusion!
  • Emulate a good Chef, whose focus is on right ingredients and creating a good mix including bringing contrasts (of colors, hardness, flavors etc., which is synonym of Change) and he tastes the dish for end result (customer delight); but does not develop the taste for the dish by itself!
    It only then that you can create or innovate new dishes i.e. new levels of your successes!! 
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