Myths, which you have been living with!

As 2nd step to understand what is behind or inside your life, read and evaluate this.

If your honest answer to all of following points is “Yes, I have been believing and living with these”, you are a “Normal Being”. If some of these are indeed “Myths” for you and you do not actually live with those, you are “Above Normal”. And, if you live with none of these, you are “Meta-Normal”.

  1. You bring your fortune or misfortune with your birth and its timing.
  2. Your talents and/or traits are gifts from your birth or from God and therefore, cannot be changed.
  3. There are people with negative vibes, whose presence affect you and your environments negatively.
  4. What you cannot enjoy now, you can enjoy later or tomorrow.
  5. You are clever enough to hide your inner self – love or hate, disappointment or enchantment, pleasure or pain, frustration or satisfaction, inclination or repulsion – to reflect on your body language.
  6. Quality in everything that you do costs you extra time, efforts, energy or money.
  7. Your instincts, gut feelings or inner voices are governed by meta physics; something that you are unable to explain.
  8. Selection range for your role model/s comes from –
    1. People with power play – Your boss, CEO, head of your country….
    2. People with popularity – Sports person, actor, entertainer, leader of popular movement
    3. People with courage – Military  commander or one, who can damage or dismantle camp of your adversary
  9. Best way to gain knowledge is to do it myself, without seeking involvement, advice or guidance from others.
  10. For best career growth (or at least to keep it safe), play safe, toe boss’ line and not challenge him/her, even if necessary.
  11. Best method to gain popularity and attention is to flaunt, taunt, comment and criticize.
  12. Best strategy to get visibility is to take a dip into crisis, cry for help and secure sympathy.
  13. You can do more than one thing or multitasking at the same moment – work on your laptop or in kitchen, listen to music and talk on cell phone.
  14. Free lunches and freebies come really free, do not have a price tag and hence, cost you nothing.
  15. Your failures or short comings are easily attributable to –
    “Inputs”, “Reasons beyond control”, “Coincidences”….. if nothing else, you would find luck, forefathers, genes or God always handy!

And, there are many more! If anyone of you believe that a particular point is not a myth, please identify same in comments space below. I plan to come back to explain why all of above are myths in real.

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Does this happen with you and your dear ones?

You may find this different; but, this is 1st of several steps that I propose to take you through to create understanding about science /facts behind your life. Read through and make your judgment close to what actually happens with you and people close to you.

  1. If you receive a call from a relative early in morning – 1st thought that comes to your mind, something has gone wrong at his/her end!
  2. Call from customer or boss breaks your sleep – 1st thing you remember is your most (negatively) used word and then, what is it?
  3. Got a tip from morning newspaper how to be more supportive? Your immediate reaction is “this is what my spouse should do” and next in line is your boss and then, adversaries.
  4. Getting late? Compromise on prayers (if you do) and breakfast.
  5. Running late? Find more red traffic signals, more barriers in reaching faster.
  6. In a rush? Forget more, err more, only to be in greater rush.
  7. Not in good mood? Mood of boss or spouse is also not good!
  8. Get into an argument with boss or spouse – you suddenly feel the distance, isolation.
  9. If you commit a mistake, 1st thought comes on how to defend it.
  10. If you face some problem with your customer or colleague or health or so and get upset or nervous, you find more problems waiting in queue. These start to wane, when you gather courage and composure or sleep overnight.
  11. If you like something, you want to have more of it – money, power, beauty, popularity or so and you also start to worry more that you would lose it.
  12. Your nearer ones look better to you, when they are not near (physically) or gone at a distance.
  13. When you wait and watch (counting time) for a thing to happen – a friend to arrive, a good news to come etc., often your wait only appears longer and may not even come through. If you ignore or let it take its own time, it often arrives faster.
  14. At least 1/3rd of your life goes in guessing (a) what would others think of you, when you do something and (b) what is happening to others!
  15. You remember the devil (unlikeable), devil is there often; if you remember saint (likeable), saint often is not there.
    At last, you go to sleep, thinking tomorrow would be better!

Please make an honest attempt to judge each point. Copy and paste the following in “Comment space below” and fill your score at 2 places:

  • Count from above that happens with me …………….. (xx)
  • Count from above that happens to one dear to me ….. (yy)

Please state, if you want to know more of such points in your daily life?

When I get your response, I shall take you to next step of “Science behind Your Life”.

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2012 can bring the Best for You

Communicating with you through my 1st blog of 2012, let me start by asking what would you like New Year to bring you?

  • Would like to enjoy your life more than ever before?
  • Would you like your life to be full of pleasure; but, without problem?
  • You would like your boss to be nice to you at least in Twenty Twelve
  • Do you wish your spouse to be kind to you?
  • Should sun be always shining on you and you would always like to feel relaxed?

How many of above wishes you want 2012 to fulfill for you? May be all of above or most of these.

Let us assume, you want to take it all. Why miss any, when there is an opportunity?

Here is what you need to do:

  1. You obviously know, how you have enjoyed your life before. Your present desire shows that it was not good enough. So, why remember what was not up to the mark? Just forget it – the past.
    This would be a sure shot to enjoy more Now!
  2. It is clear you had problems before. You do not want them anymore; rather hate them, as those have impacted your pleasure.
    Are those still around?
    1. No; then why worry? In any case, you do not like them. Start to worry or think of those, whom you like or love. Why to be a nerd by bothering about what you dislike?
    2. If yes, then tell me of your problems. As a friend, I would be happy to help.
  3. Are you a boss and nice to your team?
    No; then you are stupid. Hang on, I am not saying this. I read it in a management guru’s book.
    If such is the case, why grumble; Behavior of your boss is commensurate with what you are.
    If yes, you have a case. Do simple things – go to the boss and tell him or her what kind of boss you are and ask politely, what you should do, so that he or she becomes nice to you – be more humble or fumble, work smarter or be less smart, be a yes man/woman or say no to indiscretions? I am sure; your boss would be nice to you….thereafter.
  4. If spouse is She, take her on an enjoyable holiday package.
    If spouse is He, give him a break and good food.
    So, you get what you give.
  5. Sun always shines; albeit you may not be seeing it. Surely, there are clouds, which are preventing sun to shine on you.
    Make efforts to remove these clouds and if required, seek some help.
    Once you are shining under the sun or sun is shining on you, your relaxation or comfort is guaranteed.

So, it is not that difficult to get the best out of 2012. Right?

You are, now, set to get what you want (though 15 days late in Twenty Twelve)!

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An interesting campaign for anti-corruption and support for Lokpal in my Housing Society

When Anna Hazare’s movement was at peak few months back, one fine evening, I saw a notice on my Society’s board requesting residents to join “candle march” coming Saturday. When that Saturday evening I heard loudest possible slogans “Mee Anna Hazare”, “Annaji, go forward, we are behind you” and so on, I could not hold back my curiosity and went down to see the march.

It was a group about 30 male and female residents in middle to old age group (out of 500 families, who live in our Society) holding candles and some wearing white cap painted with slogan “Mee Anna”. I saw that highest pitch among participants was that of an ex-government official, who seems to be having assets disproportionate to the position he had held. There were few sober residents, who normally like to follow others. There were few sober residents, who normally like to follow others. Then, there were some, who have known liking to hear their own voice, paying little attention to what they actually speak. Others were those, who like to create obstacles in good work, our Society would propose.

I felt pity on an old lady, who was not able to walk properly and raise her voice. I could not resist asking her why she is troubling herself. Brightness came into her eyes and she explained enthusiastically “I want to teach lesson to our society’s security supervisor, because he is corrupt and takes money from contract labor working in society’s premises. That is what I have heard from other residents; but managing committee is not doing anything about it. When Annaji would be successful, I would drag this fellow to Lokpal”! Next day, one of my friends told me that his driver wants to take leave and go to New Delhi to strengthen hands of Anna and his team to get billions of dollars of black money from foreign accounts back in India. He believes that when such money comes in, he would get some being backward class and would lead richer life.

I felt this candle march with its participants is a true image (at micro level) of anti-corruption movement at large! It left me wondering can Gandhinian ways of protest be applied to solve an issue, which is so deeply ingrained in our system and enact legislation with threats?

It is tempting for some to raise public frenzy and fury through brinkmanship. But then, expectations of people are also raised sky high and if these are not managed properly, such movement or strategy is destined to fizzle out! This is what seems to have dawned recently in Mumbai and enthusiasts of candle march in my society now!

Corruption in all walks of life needs to be tackled with strong will and for that, realism and foresight should descend on our leaders. Corruption is an ailment, which not only requires treatment through well thought out laws and honest practices; but it would also need preventive measures like teaching Ethics in every school, college, institution and enterprise and implanting same in the minds of people like a Faith.

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If India has poor image, it is largely to do with our poor attitude and approach

On 31-December-2001, my wife asked our maid how she and her family were going to celebrate New Year. She said in despair they have debt but not money, so what is there to celebrate?

Exactly 10 years later, our same maid came to work on 1st Jan morning, mumbling song of movie Body Guard and started narrating to my wife how she celebrated New Year eve. She and entire family went to McDonald restaurant, ate burger and fries, watched midnight TV screen program, before getting back home at 2 a.m. My wife could now understand hangover of Body Guard.

Our neighbor told us that her maid was praising her stars on the midnight of New Year, as her husband fondly surprised by getting a pizza and coke for her (and of course country liquor for himself).

So, is India as poor as perceived or we feel shy to project our improving image to the world? We do not seem to take pride in how India and large section of its population have progressed. May be it is because we tend to rue and cry a lot over problems; blame everybody else from our stars to fore-fathers, genes to God for what we do not have. If nothing else, we find the Prime Minister of India as the best scapegoat to take out our frustration. Most of us would expect someone else to come to our rescue. Hence, some would believe that astrologers or horoscope readers can do that.

Such attitude does not encourage you to take pride and hold your head in high esteem for what you are and becoming. Shun above attitude, put faith in yourselves, make efforts to address your needs and shape your own destiny, then you would be on top of your world (1).

There is yet another aspect typically present in most of us. If we face a problem or crisis, we tend to distance ourselves, especially when we believe we have no or little role to play and instead, we like to point fingers. Until some weeks back, we had a problem at national level of food inflation raging high. Common perception was this is a problem of only government. All that every other person at home or street would do is to unleash acrimony in private or public or through internet, TV and print media. In the whole chain of producing food items to reaching end consumers, there are several players or agencies, which have some role to influence pricing. Rather than showing a responsible behavior, they were mostly spectator or crying foul. Now that inflation has nearly become zero, no one has remorse for what was said.

Problems are solved easily and efficiently by helping, if you can or at least not hurting by your actions or expressions (2).

So, India’s image is on the roll and by changing our attitude and approach – refer (1) and (2), we can not only accelerate our own growth; but also help that for nation.

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