Dealing with Aggressive, Action oriented, Work-to-rule and Dogmatic bosses

Aggressive boss

  1. Things that you would discover in him
  • Highly energetic
  • Lot of ego, which he confuses with his pride
  • Fast paced and pushy
  • Would set tough targets and challenges
  • Would mostly talk loud and without filter
  • Would not care, if others are hurt from his actions; lacks empathy
  • Bold; but mostly over confident

If he starts making lives of most people difficult and takes nothing for No, he is heading towards extreme right of scale i.e. being toxic. And, if he regrets hurting people and recognizes good performance, he heads towards left of scale i.e. being dynamic. However, remember his category still remains “aggressive”.

2. Things that you should do to click

  • Pay extra attention to your health.
  • Be forthright and fearless with your boss.
  • Be aggressive in your speed of actions.
  • Appreciate his aggressiveness; but apprise him of possible fall outs and at the same time, your preparedness to bear the brunt.
  • Do not get bogged with formalities and rituals.
  • Do not argue; just augment.
  • Use patience and silence as your tools to tackle him.

Action-oriented boss

  1. Things that you would discover in him
  • Very active
  • Out spoken; may boasts at times
  • Would drive lot of actions, without caring too much for results
  • In case of poor results, would not mind to blame everyone else
  • Over confident; but may confuse it as real confidence
  • Short – lived memories
  • Driving what he believes, without considering others’ views would drive him towards Aggressive side; on other hand, becoming conscious of others’ comfort level and limitations would take him towards Pragmatism.

2. Things that you should do to click

  • Match his speed of action with your speed of closing, what is in your hands
  • Do not initiate long discussions with him and instead focus on your actions
  • Do not dither
  • Be brief and willing
  • Be prompt to bring to his attention any barrier or show stopper
  • Be systematic in documenting your actions

Work-to-rule boss

  1. Things that you would discover in him
  • Disciplined and balanced
  • Organized
  • Controlled temperament
  • Very compliant
  • Immune to criticism
  • Often inflexible
  • Dispassionate and conservative

2. Things that you could do

  • Be vociferously compliant and stickler to rules
  • Do not expect out of turn recognition to your performance
  • Do not lose your initiatives and drive to change and put forward same to boss by explaining how it is beneficial to organization and would be liked by top management (bosses of the boss)
  • You have best opportunity to learn “how to live with NOs”
  • Learn to enjoy “lack of excitement”
  • Appreciate boss for his work ethics and imbibe what you don’t have

Dogmatic boss

  1. Things that you would observe
    Like the case of aggressive boss, you do not need to dig to discover things about him; these would be auto-visible.
  • Very set pattern of thinking and doings
  • Tough and rigid
  • Courageous to carry forward his conviction against odds
  • Poor listener; he may appear to listen, but actually not
  • Conventional but complex
  • Impervious to others’ feelings
  • May command respect of top bosses

2. Things that you should do

  • Listen to him attentively, while looking into his eyes
  • Extend your full support and try to win his heart
  • Bestow your appreciation for his focused approach
  • Tell him that you are custodian of his vision
  • Now, seek his blessings to do things differently and flexibly

 

Dealing with action dis-oriented, submissive and pragmatic bosses 

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Winning Action dis-oriented, Submissive and Pragmatic bosses

Action dis-oriented boss

  1. Things that you would discover in him
  • He believes that he has open mind
  • He believes he has highest passion for his company and employees
  • He believes in Change and New Ideas
  • He is proud of what he has done in past
  • But, he is confused
  • He is indecisive
  • He may assign right to the Wrong and wrong to the Right

2.  Things that you should do for him

  • You should be seen by him as systematic and methodical
  • Request delegation of authority, evolve decision and present it for his decision
  • Catalog all of your actions to appraise him fully
  • Give him full credit for success of such decision
  • Defend him, if things fail and you shoulder the responsibility

You have the best case to learn “decision making” out of indecision!

Submissive boss

  1. Things that you would observe in him
  • He would be dutiful and humble
  • Would have conservative approach
  • Would be willing to delegate a lot
  • He would seek ideas and opinions of others
  • He would be God fearing
  • He could have split personality
  • He would be flexible to the extent that he can be bent either way!

In some cases, such boss may promote what is known in French “Laissez faire” style of working i.e. leave the group entirely to itself to manage.

2.  Things that you should do to click

  • Help him to make right choices
  • Actively participate to drive right decisions
  • Show full ownership on such decisions and outcome
  • Do not allow him to be manipulated by those, who may like to exploit his flexibility and you let your boss know the support you are rendering on this

Pragmatic boss

  1. Things that you would discover in him
  • He would be a progressive thinker
  • Practical and logical
  • Realistic and dynamic
  • Flexible and approachable
  • Fair and reasonable in his decisions
  • He could be a change agent
  • He would be people friendly, customers included

2.  What you can do to click with him

  • Go extra miles to demonstrate that you are well meaning
  • Your ownership and integrity cannot be compromised
  • Show that you are focused on attention to details and quality
  • Be well informed and brief, during your meetings with him
  • Never take him as granted and be very straight forward

There is one variation in this category of boss – Pragmatic + Charismatic (P+C), where you do not have to do anything to click with him; he will come and click with you! This class of boss may not be very common.

So, you can, now, make your days at work or home happier by:

  • Understanding 1st and 2nd most dominant traits of your boss
  • Using Universal Formula
  • Unique actions to click
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Misconceptions around Work-Life balance

Misconceptions start from very description of popular term “Work-Life balance”. Work is actually part of life. The mistake is to treat Work and Life (i.e. personal life) as 2 separate entities and then, talk of balancing.
Most successful people have lot of work, less of free time; but they are mostly healthy and rarely talk of missing on work-life balance. Why? They might be auto-balancing, which very few can see!

Misconceptions galore

  1. Treating Work and Life as 2 separate compartments.
    These are actually 2 aspects of one Whole – Life; or you can say 2 sides of same coin.
  2.  Assumption that how and what you do in your personal life would not impact professional life or vice versa is wholly misplaced.
  3. Exaggerated notions
  • Dedication at work means over-working.
  • Ownership inevitably means stress and worry.
  • Getting fatigued and tired is alright, week-end is there to recharge.
  • At last, I have time for my family.
  • Oh! Now that I am retired from work, I can do what I always wanted to do.

    4. Split behavior

  • Hands-on at work, hands-off at home
  • Bull at work, bear at home or vice versa
  • Involved at work, indulge at home
  • Conscious at work, crazy at home
  • Pressure at work, release at home

These misconceptions also bring you morning or Monday blues.

Drawing a parallel
What you do in personal life, are directly relevant to your professional life. Look at these parallels:

  1. Correct way of treating employees is how you treat your family – respectful and reasonable, considerate and caring.
  2. Best example of ownership on your team or project is how you parent (especially a mother) your children.
  3. Your loyalty to Company should be no less than your loyalty to Spouse.
  4. You can’t do without courage and calm to manage a conflict at work and that’s what you need also at home.
  5. What drives you for decisions on your personal investments should also drive you for business decisions at work.

What can auto-balance your “Work-Life”

  1. Believe that work is never a burden or liability. It is meant to be enjoyed as much as you enjoy while at home or holidays.
    At one stroke, you would develop your dedication, dynamism and diligence.
  2. What you like to do, do not postpone it to another day. Find a way to do little of all what you like or have to; but incrementally and without compromising your duties.
    If you have a desire to find a way, you would surely get it! Our dogma – we do not believe this works. Factually, it does!!
  3. If you want to be a horse of long race, you ought to be healthy and happy.
  4. Forget that “over work or excess stress” can be off-set by “over rest or excess relaxation”. Both are bad!
  5. Eliminate 2 Big blunders, most commit – to ignore “qualitative development of self” and “securing future”.
    On Qualitative Development, you normally think –
  • It is a separate subject.
  • It would happen, as you gain experience.
  • It would come, when you get training.
  • It is not meaningful to your work and meaningless for your vacation.
    Human race is most fortunate to learn what is good and what is not, what is right and wrong, from childhood through academia to now. Hence, you know these already! Experience would only consolidate, training would polish and some medium would help you to change for better.
    Make it integral to your work and life and drive your qualitative development.
    Securing Future is the best “stress relieving dose” –
  • When you earn, you spend and when you spend, think to save.
  • Save and invest to secure your/family’s future. Many think it is not importance today; they regret tomorrow.

Here is “What You Should Do”

  1. Set your definition right on “Work-Life balance”.
  2. See the parallels in Professional and Personal life.
  3. Seek joy in everything you do and blend it with qualitative aspects.
  4. Stop over-doings in name of passion or vacation.
  5. Slice your time, when you are not sleeping, into –
    40 to 45% at Work
    40 to 45% not at Work (for family, socializing, travel…)
    10 to 20% for your health, self-development and securing future.
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When your confidence starts to shake..……

Often you may find your confidence level going down or shaking. This can dent your efficiency and effectiveness, comfort and composure. If you can find the reasons, it is then possible for you to address. You would discover that some of these could be very trivial and some are terrible!

Look at what can tamper your confidence:

1. Conflict of thoughts

  • Is my belief right or wrong?
  • Will it work or will it not?
  • Shall I do or shall I drop?
  • What is it, if I go wrong?
  • Standing at cross roads; unable to decide which direction to go.

Though you believe in decisions; but you become indecisive!

2. Conflict of interests

  • Your stakes are high; but you suspect setback!
  • Your image is high; but you worry for it getting impaired.
  • People have high expectations from you; but you fear failure.
3. Conflict of actions
  • Gap in what you believe and what you do.
  • Using duel yard sticks – one for self and another for others.
  • You initiate action; but lack conviction in pursuing.
  • Attempts to gain at the cost of others.
4. Overly Concerned
  • What would others think of you?
  • Getting nervous with size of audience or position of person/s, with whom you need to communicate.
  • Fear of unknown.
  • Desire to please all, though not possible.
  • Envy those, whom you perceive as better performers, rather than learning from them.
5. Contradictory results
  • Putting-in what you think as your best efforts; but success eludes you.
  • Driving for a change; but you are driven to wall.
  • People take your sincerity and sanctity as granted and they do not hesitate to manipulate.
  • You discover your trusted or dear ones digging under your feet.

6.     Facing Crisis

  • Setback to your image, status or career.
  • Your actions triggering a controversy or raking up an issue.
  • Your beliefs prove to be wrong or exaggerated, arousing your reaction or ego.
  • Fingers being raised on your character or your credibility being doubted.
  • Your health is not helping.

7.     Getting Criticism

  • Dressing-down by your boss or spouse.
  • You are put down by your peers.
  • Not being recognized for what you perceive as good work.
  • When others feel hurt by your doings.

So, what you need to do?

Just 2 things –

A. Be aware of (1) to (4) and abandon or reject these outright!

Heaven would not fall on earth, if you still go wrong. But, if you don’t do that, chances of heaven falling down would only improve. After all, you need not be right every time and “wrong would only make you right”. So, get it going; do not hold.

B. Evaluate (5) to (7); somewhere you would be wrong and elsewhere you may be right. Hold the Right and correct the Wrong!

Here is the key to real confidence:

Sticking to own beliefs and views, regardless these are right or wrong, is over- confidence. It would kill you one day.

Under-confidence is an ailment, which would trouble you every day.

Having own beliefs and views, with room for change and correction whenever necessary, is the only Real Confidence! It would be difficult to get shaken!!

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Secrets behind Chefs’ dishes and Mothers’ recipes

This is the next step to create understanding towards “Science behind Your Life”. Wonder; what it has got to do with such topic? That is the secret, you need to know.

Did you observe why we like bread crumbs in soup? Why many people like crunchy chocolates?

Bread crumbs are crispy, soft but solid and gives a good taste with soup, which is liquid. Chocolates are soft; but additional flavor is created by making its surface or inside layers crunchy or by adding nuts. Even, crunchy sound creates add on in the taste, you enjoy!

What is at work in both of above cases? Taste of each constituent in soup or chocolate does matter; but what makes a real difference is feeling or flavor created by substances of contrasts – solid and liquid in case of soup, crispy and creamy in crunchy chocolates! The most of famous and popular chefs plan and prepare their dishes with one of the most critical criteria of creating a Feeling of Contrast. I am not sure whether chefs themselves are conscious of this fact; but they seem to practice it and this is what makes their dishes different, tasty and awesome.

You can look at several popular dishes or drinks – crème brulee, Irish coffee, cocktails or chef’s Italian or Indian or other dishes. One of the most salient features would be to create a contrast not only in tastes; but also how these are presented or decorated. The combinations could be:

  • Hot and cold
  • Hard and soft
  • Solid and liquid
  • Sweet and sour
  • Crunchy and creamy
  • Coarse and fine
  • Thick and thin
  • Froth and liquid
  • Bitter and mild/sweet
  • Spongy and sticky
  • Colors in contrast – green, yellow, beige, maroon, white, brown or black etc.

Mothers’ recipes are normally around creating varieties and could also have above combinations.

Note, all of such dishes with great taste trigger all or most of your senses – sight, smell (aroma), taste, touch and hearing (like crunchy bites), and these get accentuated because of contrasts!

So, essentially man likes contrast, variation, variety and these are nothing but synonyms of “Change”. Often, we are not conscious of our natural likes. A change is man’s obvious choice. Often, we would resist or react against a change and hence spoil its beauty. Do not repel; but relish “A Change”.  Sign of real taste is when all of your senses are triggered. You are then ecstatic. You are alive, because there are changes going on all time within your body. You would be dead otherwise. Hence, a Change is inherent to Life.

Real leaders drive or bring “Change”. If you cannot do that, embrace the “Change” now; you would then have a chance one day to learn how to drive it! If you reject it, you would most probably be in peril.

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