Majority show sincerity n goodness out of fear or serving self!

Jury from extensive research is out – the truth is what above caption speaks. There is a clear case to search your soul. A very high percentage of people – more than 90%, believe or make others to believe that they are sincere and good; but they display these qualities in public or private, corporates and communities out of some fear or to serve their own agenda. In that case, how can they be termed as being really good and sincere?

If you indeed have these or related positive qualities, those would get exhibited in your expressions, emotions and every action and thoughts of yours. You do not need to make any effort; these would simply show up not selectively; but inherently and automatically!

There are essentially 3 categories of people:

  1. No goodness and sincerity
    People in this group are pain and problems for society. We will not delve much, as this category is well known; but in minority.
  2. Self-depicted goodness and sincerity
    More than 90% people around the world come in this category. No doubt, it is far better than 1st category; but not good enough!
  3. Inherent goodness and sincerity
    This is one most desired; but what is in most demand is always in dearth!

Why majority live with Self-depicted goodness and sincerity

We will focus on reasons why most people want to be seen as sincere, sympathetic, honest, good, ethical and reasonable:

  • Self-image supersedes all
    Everyone wants to preserve/ build and enhance self-image. Compromising that is ruled out. This drives most to do what can be seen as good, regardless whether they imbibe that or not. Considerable part of behavioral pattern of people, drum or chest beating gets governed by self-image factor!
    You can, now, imagine what such people do, when they are in a situation; where self-image is not at stake!
  • Preserving and raising Self-esteem
    Moral and motivational levels get a boost, when you show sincerity, sobriety, reasonableness and rationality. Depending upon a situation, many spontaneously show these qualities, even when same are not embedded in their nature. Naturally, observers or on-lookers would get impressed and such people receive respect and recognition. This serves a big purpose to their esteem as well as ego!
  • Fear of Failure
    No one sensible would like to fail or be seen as making mistakes. There is general awareness what would not precipitate a failure, if not success – like being honest, humble, sincere, being good, considerate and so on. People pull these qualities in their doings to serve their agenda to avoid failure; however, same vanish, when they win. This is precisely the reason why success gets into the head of many!
  • Doing as ritual
    Nearly all learn from their Papa, Mama, teachers and preachers what qualities are good for them. For some, these qualities get inculcated in their character and for others; these remain just awareness without conviction. Latter category of people demonstrates these only as a ritual with no or little ownership or no belief behind. This puts them easily in reverse gear and drop most what they know is good, if they get into crisis or conflict.
  • Doing, as others do
    Most have herd mentality – follow others blindly, with no reasoning or rationale. They do not even realize why they do so, as they make no effort to understand. When “to follow your idol, mentor or guru blindly” is a farce, not to talk of such herd walks!
  • Playing Safe
    Man inherently has tendency to play safe, prefers conservatism and not pragmatism. This drives him to do all what would avoid troubles or hassles; but when troubles actually land up, then he tumbles down and unable to manage. This is because he is on flimsy and shaky grounds and has no understanding of what is indeed good and respond.
  • Compliance to Laws or Rules
    Most practice and display discipline, honesty, ethics and prudence for fear of laws or rules and not by choice. Survival in many organizations is possible, only when you are compliant. What happens when these qualities are not built into the character of an individual and fear of the laws/rules has flown away on some occasions? Rather than staying compliant, he/she would circumvent. There are innumerable cases in corporate or public life around the world, when people least expected to break ethics or prudential norms, have been caught doing so.
    It is a big bane, if goodness and sincerity remains on your body and not get into your blood!
  • Fear of God or Divine forces
    Many take great pleasure in declaring that they are god-fearing! For the fear of god, they become pious and positive. They create an impression that they are holy cows. I have not come across anyone asking them why fear of god? If you are indeed good and hence believe in good karmas, then why fear of god? They fear, because they are actually not sincere, sane or sacred; these attributes surface time to time only by selection. These do not form part and parcel of their character and convictions!

Pitfalls of Self-depicted Goodness and Sincerity

  • You would seldom enjoy full fruits from your work or activities.
  • Sometimes, despite your best efforts and intentions, you do not get desired results. Why? Your good qualities do not exist as a whole!
  • You would have fluctuating fortune or face cycles of good time and bad time; success and failure; ups and downs.
  • You would not be able to drive as much a change or create impact in your company or community, as some people are able to do – the reason being that they from category 3, as opposed to 2 of yours.

So, if you want to be different and distinguished, deliver consistent performance and drive a moral Change around you, be honest to assess in which category are you. It is not difficult to come to a right conclusion – check “if you are in crisis; but hold ground and count on the qualities you possess”, “when temptation is to compromise your honesty because you see no harm; but remain steadfast on your ethical values”, “when you can afford to ignore, you still inspire people” and “when you have no pressure, you still press for a Change”, you would qualify for category 3.

Your World would be wow, your Body language would Bloom and your Character would be Charismatic, if you make your positive qualities inherent part of life, reflect those as a Whole every time effortlessly and not in part or pieces!

 

You may also like
If you wish to get freedom from fear or frustration …!
Misconceptions around Work-Life balance
10 Comments
  • Rudra
    Sep 5,2012 at 11:46 am

    This post reminds me of a fact I’ve been following since my birth – “The actual personality of yours is how you behave when you’re alone or when nobody’s watching you”. That’s when your real self comes out, isn’t it!! 🙂

    I strongly believe in the fact that whatever you do with/to yourself, the world will do that with/to you… you love yourself, world will love you… you hate yourself, and this world will become an impracticable place for you to endure!!

    Self-depicted Goodness and Sincerity is a total waste of time… it doesn’t get you anything, doesn’t get you anywhere!! Show your true colors to the world and success is guaranteed! 🙂 Fear is for cowards; Self-belief is what you should have when you express your genuineness and want people to appreciate that. Nobody will do that for you… its only you and your poise who’ll have to take the initiative.

    To sum-up the post with one sentence – “Sincerity and Goodness should be shown unconditionally… unreservedly… wholeheartedly and enthusiastically”

    Completely agree with your thoughts!!

    Cheers!!

    • Sep 6,2012 at 11:41 am

      I highly appreciate your complementary views and confirmatory comments!

      Every thing would fall in place, if one is inherently good and sincere. It is not difficult to be like that. One needs will and passion to implement. Yet, most would make out as if it can happen only in heaven. That is why we find more than 90% people in category 2 and they struggle.

      Your thoughts are on a very right track; please translate into your daily life.

  • Kaushik
    Sep 3,2012 at 9:12 am

    Dear Murliji,

    Once again a very insightful train of thoughts. Yes, I guess it is human nature in general to go with the tide or do what will require the least trouble on his behalf, while at the same time projecting him as a respected member of society thereby preserving his self esteem. As you’d see that I am describing the person falling in the 90% category although much that we’d desire that this number belongs to category 3 people. In that case probably we’d turn the clock back to Sat yug. However if we still believe that it is possible to increase the percentage falling in the third category then it should begin with everyone having an infant should think about how to create a personality in that infant that’d make him classify into the category 3.
    I shall pose a question here: Do you believe that it is possible to turn one self from the being into the category 2 of people to be elevated to the category 3? As someone has said that one cannot change one’s attitude or behaviour for good which could do this transform, that’s why I wish to know your views on the same

    Regards

    Kaushik

    • Sep 4,2012 at 12:56 pm

      Many thanks for your thought provoking views and comments! Here is what I would like to share:

      The very fact that more than 90% of people are in category 2 indicates that it is not easy; but entails “efforts” to be in category 3! Purpose of this post is make people aware that they live in illusions, if they believe they are indeed good; whereas they may show split behavior. Let take a very simple example – you would not like your boss to be bad. Even if your boss is good most of the time, you would not like his/her bad behavior even seldom. So, what is your wish – my boss be good all the time. How can he/she be, without being inherently good. Like you, many more might be wishing the same! Now, you want your boss to be invariably good. Think, how can he be, unless you can also be?

      Often, we create situation of hopelessness by saying this is not Satyug (I do not know what it was really like; who made it to disappear for what purpose?? All that all can claim is this is what has been told to them or read what has been written by someone. Can that be a truth; I am not sure!)

      Again, we resign to our fate by stating that we cannot change the people. Yes, you cannot and you need not. But, the least you can do is to make efforts! Making efforts is all that is needed for All; you cannot imagine what change of order it can bring. But, people throw up before or after making little efforts. You need to remain at it.

      As regards changing from category 2 to 3, look at what is needed – category 2 people know what is good; but they blow good sometimes and bad sometimes; hot sometimes and cold sometimes. Do you think they get same benefit either of the times? Definitely not, like I have said of boss’ behavior above. But they want to be seen as good always!! So what is needed – convert your wish into will and do it.

      In conclusion, all that we need is Will to Do and actually Do it.

      I would be obliged, it could share the above with all whom you know and taste its power.

  • Sushil Jain
    Sep 2,2012 at 9:00 pm

    Unless the people are given opportunity to know their Self at the right time of their life….say schools, colleges, training institutions through systematic wisdom anchored value education as an essential subject…..little is expected to change…. Once we know who we are, what are our requirements, what we essentially wish for, what is our present status, what is our potential… through a process of self exploration, ….there will be a possibility created for transformation…. all inherent values will flow out with ease…..

    • Sep 2,2012 at 9:54 pm

      Many thanks for your illustrious thoughts! I also appreciate that these have given me opportunity to share some more thoughts!!

      Your views do raise some pertinent questions:

      Who would change the current system in schools, colleges…, so that people get opportunity to know self? One option is to wait for something to happen. if nothing has happened so far, no one can be sure of what would happen in future. Other option is for people to learn from the opportunity being created and drive. And that is the option, which has salutary effect.

      On process of self-exploration to know self, no one else but the person himself has to start and he can take help/learning from what is being presented to him. Unfortunately, most do not do that and instead wish external forces to do it or expect that to come somehow!

      Inherent values have to be built by each individual through process of learning and Change.

      • Sushil Jain
        Sep 6,2012 at 8:37 pm

        Thanks. Good questions. Q1. There is a widespread realization of the need for value education. All schools and colleges are talking about it. But people did not know how to do it. It is being done in many different ways which has its own impact but not adequate.

        Systematic learning in this area (Self Awareness/ knowledge) will come when it is taken up as an essential subject and taught in an explorative, experiential, and interactive way…. It is easy to understand and experience (especially for students, they are not conditioned) since everyone of us have experiences based on the qualities of life…. It is just a facilitation in creating an awareness on this…

        As I shared with you earlier, recent experiments at IIIT Hyderabad, UPTECH and Punjab Tech Universities have shown that it can happen and happen fast…. Even Bhutan (being a Buddhist country) has gone on full stream on this experiment..

        • Sep 8,2012 at 12:14 pm

          I highly appreciate your views and additional info on value education. I am pleased to know that this kind of education has been introduced in some institutions and many other are going to follow suit. I wish great success.

  • Murli Lohia
    Sep 2,2012 at 8:37 am

    Dear Lyndon,

    I feel grateful to get your illuminating and encouraging views! It strengthens my resolve to discover truth about our lives and share more and more!!

    I feel fortunate to interact with you. Please take care.

    Regards,

    Murli

  • Murli Lohia
    Sep 2,2012 at 8:35 am

    Transferred from LinkedIn
    Lyndon Berchy has sent you a message.
    Date: 9/01/2012
    Subject: RE: Majority show sincerity n goodness out of fear or serving self!
    Dear Murli
    Profound, inspiring and truthfully honest. Thanks for the blessing of knowing you and for the great gift of sharing.

Leave Your Comment

Your Comment*

Your Name*
Your Webpage

*